Monthly Archive: June 2010

All I Want Is To Connect

June 13th, 2010 Joy Based Parenting, Parenting Advice No comments


Often when trying to control behavior we forget to tune in to our need to connect from the heart. When we see, our children, doing something that causes us discomfort, we often
connect with our desire for them to change instead of our desire to connect with their need.

When we see start seeing behavior, as a communication we begin to see our child’s desire to connect in a new way. All behavior is trying to inform us of what we are connected to inside. If your child is struggling inside they may connect outside in a way that you may judge as misbehavior and therefore want to control.

Practice: Today when you reach out to your child, to connect, and they ignore you, or connect in a way that causes you discomfort………Pause……See if you can make a choice to connect with your heart, instead of demanding that they connect with you in the way you want before opening your heart.

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Puppy Love

June 4th, 2010 Joy Based Parenting, Parenting Advice, Unconditional Love No comments

Think about the last time you saw a new puppy….Remember, when your child was little and saw their first puppy? Watch a video of a puppy licking a little one and experience the joy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-5_SW9zh2w&feature=related

The innocence we experience when love is given freely is always available. It opens our hearts and penetrates even the strongest barriers. For a moment, we remember our tenderness and return to our ground of being, “love”. We forget our struggles and see the reflection of our innocent playful self. Our hearts open, and we give back. Amazing.

This ground of being, “love”, is always present and yet we often cover it with our worries and fears. Especially, as a parent, I find it is easier to focus on all my worries and desires to protect my daughter instead of seeing through the eyes of love. When I’m able to see the innocence in her behaviors instead of focusing on the fear, I’m able to open and embrace a tenderness which holds her in a loving way.

When I’m tight and fearful, I might see her actions as threatening or trying to manipulate me in some way. Innocence is nowhere to be found and in my tightness I want to tighten down on her.

Remembering her playful puppy nature allows me to hold this truth of who she truly is even when she forgets.

Practice: Today, find your playful puppy nature and see how the world appears. Try going out in the world, figuratively licking everyone you see, and watch your heart open. Be the role model for your child and enjoy the fun.

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