Being a single mother can often be challenging. Getting my needs met, when I feel responsible for all of the needs in our family, can often seem impossible. So, I often find myself holding out and holding out and taking care of everyone else and then at some point the damn breaks and I can’t hold back any longer. In those moments, it feels like I’m going to be a care giver forever. I’m always going to be cleaning the house, I’m always going to be the maid, I’m always going to be the one who does EVERYTHING!
I forget, that before I know it, I won’t have any popcicle wrappers to pick up. I won’t have a sweet little girl to snuggle up next to at night, kicking me at 2am in the morning. All of those things that feel like a nuisance will be gone. Ahhh! I take a moment and remember back to “before” and how even though I can fantasize that “life was better” its not the truth. I longed for the kind of contact I have with my daughter. I longed to be loved so completely that I could bring joy to another by picking up a popcidle wrapper. I longed to enter into a world of freedom and joy! This my daughter gives me in spades. My challenge is am I willing to join her or continue to think “this will be forever”.